Potato Salad Kids

by Patrick O'Connor, Ph.D.

There are two groups of students that keep high school counselors awake at night in the fall. The first group of 2 AM students are the ones who aren’t going to graduate on time. Yes, you worked out a plan where a full schedule, a night school class, work study, and a Saturday dual enrollment class will get them a diploma. But this is a student who, at best, passed four of six classes in a regular high school schedule. Is this new plan too much?

I call these students the Potato Salad kids, named after a PE teacher I worked with who once asked me in June how the Potato Salad calls were going—“You know”, he said, “’hold the potato salad/hold the beer/your little darling/isn’t graduating this year’”. 

To sleep well, do two things. First, to help students avoid this kind of senior meeting in the first place, set aside regularly scheduled time in the office (not in front of your home refrigerator at 2 AM) to review your student support efforts for students in grades 9-11—what’s good, what’s bad, what’s missing, what’s needed. Yeah, it means a little less time with students, but when the house is falling down, you fix the roof before you make dinner. Help from administrators is paramount, and if you have a study skills or student support center, bring them in. 

Experience suggests many of these students have had classes with teachers who only teach content, not the study skills needed to understand the content. That’s a much bigger challenge to take on, but if your administrator is game, go for it. (Pro tip: Whatever you do, be sure to ask the failing students what they need to succeed. A true game changer.)

For the seniors you’re pretty sure aren’t going to be able to right the ship by June, there’s a three-step process:

Cut yourself some slack The same counseling services you’re offering 95% of the students either got them to graduation or at least didn’t get in their way. Unless you told Billy’s teachers to flunk Billy on purpose, the issues for Billy’s challenges are his, not yours. Move on.

Buy high quality snacks You don’t want your next meeting with these students to be a meeting about graduation. You want it to be a meeting about life. Creating that atmosphere requires a change of atmosphere. Pizza does that. Cold soda. Mozzarella sticks.

Have a real conversation The counseling techniques you learned in grad school likely didn’t work with these students, so it’s time to see them as your neighbor’s kid, your niece or nephew—maybe even your own. That requires a different approach, and different questions:

“So, it’s the day after final exams. No more high school for you. Maybe no more school ever. What’s next?”

“Why is that what’s next?”

“What do you need to get ready for what’s next?”

“How can I help?”

Right—you are assuming the student finishes high school. That’s because you want them to start thinking that way, which makes whatever they need to do to finish high school that much more important to them. That nurtures success.

Yeah, you’ll likely need Plan B, and likely Plans C, D, and E. But that’s later. For now, it’s time to get them to believe in themselves. That alone increases the chances that most of Plan A will work, so they only end up with a class or two to finish in summer school to get a diploma. That means that, by next September, nobody knows they were a Potato Salad kid.

Not bad.

Making the Most of a College Fair

by Patrick O'Connor, Ph.D.

Need to discover colleges? Try a college fair, which is a great way to learn more about all kinds of colleges, and very helpful if you’re deciding which college campuses to visit. Typically held in the fall and spring, college fairs can have representatives from up to 400 colleges, all eager to talk with you about their college and your life. Many fairs feature information sessions on applying to college and for financial aid, and most fairs are free.

The college fair format translated nicely to the Internet during the COVID crisis. Each college has its own room within the site, so you can “wander” from one school to the other and stay as long as you like. In many cases, you’ll find you’re the only one in the room, which means you get a shot at a mini-interview with the college representative, who is often the person who will first read your college application.

With so many colleges, it’s easy to be intimidated. Take (or if it’s an online fair, have handy) a highlighter, a pen, an unofficial copy of your transcript, and five questions committed to memory that will help you learn more about each college—information you can’t get online. What you ask is up to you—majors, food, chances for research, cost, social life—just make sure the answers will help you decide if this place is worth a closer look.

If it’s an in-person fair, get a map of where the colleges are located BEFORE you start meeting colleges. A list of participating colleges is usually on the fair’s Website, so you can scope this out ahead of time.

With either kind of fair, once you’re with a college rep, you might have to wait to ask questions—and that’s good! This gives you a chance to listen to what the college rep is saying to other students—since they will most likely be discussing general questions, you can use your time to ask questions more specific to your interests.

Once it’s your turn, get busy. “Hi, my name is (first and last name; NO student does this, which is exactly why you should—it shows confidence and gives the rep something to remember about you) and I go to John Lewis High School.” From here, you want to ask your questions; look the admissions rep in the eye when they answer your question, and don’t rush them.

If you feel like things are going well, and there’s not much of a crowd, pull out your transcript (or share it on your screen) and say “Just one more question. I’m putting my senior year schedule together. Here’s what I’ve taken so far. What other courses would your college like me to take?’ Again, NO ONE does this at a college fair, which is why you should. Most of the time you’ll get some great advice; sometimes, you may get a scholarship offer—but don’t be surprised if they don’t know what to say, since few students do this.

Make quick notes about this college before you visit the next one—you don’t want to have all the colleges blend together. This is easier to do at an online fair, but if you’re at a face-to-face event, find a way to do this. It’s crucial.

If you can get to seven to ten colleges and spend time at an information session, call it an evening with some post-fair pizza. You now have some solid information on which colleges are worthy of further investigation, and some solid information on yourself as well—truly a dynamic duo.

Free College Counseling for Your Students and You

by Patrick O'Connor, Ph.D.

I’m happy to tell you a free college counseling tool is now available for you and your families.

Nineteen years ago, I had a counselor’s dream job. No testing duties, no scheduling duties, no graduation checks, no lunch duty—and all I did was college counseling, with a caseload of 45 seniors. This was a far cry from my first year as a school counselor, where I had a caseload of over 400 students, all seniors, and I was in charge of everything. I even had to meet with students to talk about any disciplinary issues they were involved in. Talk about awkward discussions.

Once that ideal year was over, nineteen years ago, I tried to figure out how I might help counselors who were still where I once was. Too many students, too many duties, and too little training in college counseling puts far too many counselors in a position where they want to help students build what comes after high school, but simply can’t.

And that’s how College is Yours was born. I wrote each chapter with three things in mind:

• If I were talking to a student in person about this aspect of college counseling, what would I tell them, and how would I say it?
• If I were a school counselor, what would I want all students to know about this part of college counseling?
• How do I keep this information short and to the point?

About 40 chapters came together, each one 600 words or less. The idea was to give students the background ideas they needed to know, in a format they would come back to. Trying to figure out how to prepare for the SAT? Open that chapter, read it in 90 seconds, and apply the information. If students had this information ahead of time, the precious minutes they had meeting with their counselors could be used to individualize college plans. There was no need to go over the basics — now was the time to bring them to life.

Nineteen years and three editions later, this format is a success, with hundreds of counselors, families and students discovering what college is all about in a way that is effective, efficient, and exciting. It’s been great being part of that journey…

…but the audience needs to be bigger.

That’s why I’m giving the book away for free. Just follow this link, and you’ll be able to:

• Read it online for free
• Download it for free
• Add it to your counseling website for free
• Email it to students and families for free
• Share it with community-based organizations, faith-based youth groups, and anyone else. 

For free.

The book has had a great run, but the cost still gets in the way of students getting the help it offers. That’s over.

My only hope is you’ll share it with all your students, including those in grades 9-11. The book has strategies about how to make the most out of high school, starting in ninth grade. Too much college planning starts too late in high school. In a few short chapters, College is Yours fixes that, all without eating up precious face-to-face time with students.

For free.

So click here, and spread the word.

We’re in a time when people don’t think college is worth it. Trouble is, they come to that conclusion before they really explore college. That needs to change, and this book can help do that. For free.

Off you go.

Counselor Letters of Recommendation Matter. Here’s Why

by Patrick O'Connor, Ph.D.

“Belinda Myers wears oversized striped men’s shirts to school nearly every day.”

My best guess is that someone had made a copy of this student’s college letter of recommendation on the school’s Xerox machine, and left the original on the glass plate. So, I read it.

It would prove to make a world of difference, since I later became a college counselor, and had to write hundreds, if not thousands, of these letters. My graduate school training taught me nothing—absolutely, positively nothing—about this, so all I was left with was my unhoned wits, and my vague recollection of the start of that one college letter I had read years ago.

It’s getting to be that time of year again, where counselors with hundreds of kids will be asked to write a letter of recommendation for them as if each student were their own child. Some colleges let counselors check a box where they can choose not to write a letter at all, simply because their caseload is so big, they don’t think they can really do the student any justice.

But that only means that the counselor letters that do get written, and get the job done, mean that much more to getting a student into college.

So try this:

The goal of the letter is, on one page, a reflection of who the student is, how they see the world, what matters to them, and what they’ve done in high school. Happily, you can say some of this without going into huge detail, as long as you know a little about the student, and a story or two that mirrors their life. 

Gather your data so that you can achieve the goal. Sure, you have way too many students—but you see nearly all of them a couple of times a year, to schedule classes, or do vocational searches. Change these exercises so that it’s less about the task at hand, and more about them. If the vocational search says they should be a mortician (by the way—they all say that), ask the student how they feel about that, or what they had hoped the results would say, and why. There’s a story. Managing those pesky schedule changes? “We can talk about your change once you tell me the best and weirdest things that happened to you this summer.” It may not tell you a story you can share with a college, but it will tell you about the student. Six or eight of these interactions, and you’re good to go.

Remember that the college isn’t looking to your letter to talk about academic readiness (that’s the transcript’s job), other than a sentence about if they are curious about the world, and how hard their classes were compared to the rest of the curriculum. The real question your letter needs to address is “Who are we getting if we admit this kid?” That’s not a letter—that’s a conversation over drinks at the end of the day. Write your letter with that in mind.

Start with the story. The line I quoted above was the first line in the letter. Not adjectives, not platitudes—a genuine look at who the student was. After the story, talk about their academics, discuss where they’re headed (because you asked about this during your junior interview with them). Finish with another story, or more of the first story, and you’re good to go.

You went into this job to get to know students, and make a difference in their lives. Get to know their story, and share it with their colleges.

New Trends (?) in College Admission

by Patrick O'Connor, Ph.D.

Summer was a time for change in college admission. Here are a few of those changes, and what they might mean to school counselors as they advise their students:

Testing Less Optional Several high profile colleges announced they are once again asking students to submit ACT and SAT scores when applying for admission. Since these colleges are among the handful mainstream media covers to death, it’s easy to think this is a trend.

It isn’t. A report from FairTest indicates about 90 percent of all colleges are still test optional, including some of the more popular ones. Some school counselors may still urge students to take a test to keep their options open, but if your students largely fit the bill of applying to colleges within 150 miles from home, knowing their policies is the best place to build your college counseling strategy.

The $100,000 Colleges National media also seemed to have a field day with the colleges where the cost of attendance pushed into six figures. Many of these articles fail to explain how few students actually pay full freight, aiming for the Chicken Little approach towards college costs that leads to fear, misunderstanding, and lots of parents who decide they can’t afford college without even bothering to look into all the options.

There are 16 colleges that pass the 100K benchmark, leaving the number of colleges under that price at, well, almost all of them. In the 1950s, average college tuition was about the cost of a new Chevrolet. Today, average college tuition is about—the cost of a new Chevrolet. Cars may cost too much today as well, but this should still be enough to begin a down-to-earth conversation about college affordability.

Want to Come Here? Great! Efforts are underway to increase college applicants, a result of the upcoming decline in high school graduates. The state of Michigan joined these efforts this summer with MI College Match, a program where qualified students fill out some basic information, including interests and their preferred college options, submit a transcript, and wait to hear back from any or all of the 21 public and private Michigan colleges participating in the program. No formal application, no essays, no letters of recommendation.

Similar to direct admission programs offered by Common Application and the state of Alabama, MI College Match is only open to students attending high schools involved with programming at the Michigan College Access Network, an organization focusing on growing college access for first gen and low-income students. The challenge for participating colleges is evaluating these applicants against those who will still be submitting a traditional application with all the trimmings. If they can make this work, it could mean a big shift in how students choose colleges.

AI and College Essays Application essays have fallen under greater scrutiny with the arrival of Artificial Intelligence, a tool that makes it much easier for students to let a computer come up with the right way to write their way into college. Early AI detection software doesn’t seem to be doing the trick, leaving admissions offices wondering what to do—not that they need it, since admissions officers have long been good at sorting out essays 17-year-olds couldn’t possibly write.

Still, help them out by making this your policy about AI, and promoting it heavily:

“Colleges expect all applicants to be the writers of their college essays—not the primary writer or chief editor, but the actual writer. Don’t use another person, or a computer, to write, or even help write your college essays. Self-discovery is hard, but it’s important. Write them yourself.”

Introduction to College (And Life)

by Patrick O'Connor, Ph.D.

A new year means a new start. Let’s remind ourselves — and our students about what really matters.

The reason schools exist The goal of education is for students to learn more about themselves and the world around them. This includes the learning of facts, the understanding and invention of ideas, how to get along well with others, and the challenges we face as residents of the planet. 

Colleges exist for these same reasons Ask any college graduate about their experience, and they will tell you about the friends they met, the moments that changed their life, and how much they learned about themselves. Most headlines insist college is just a place for job preparation, that paying more for tuition than you’ll realize in pay differential is a waste of time. Evidently not.

Not everyone needs to go to college Future barbers are just as important as future doctors, and they don’t need to go to college, any more than future doctors need to go to barber school. On the other hand, if they’d like a bigger look at the world around them without having to leave the continent, a year or two of college could do that in ways few other things can. They won’t make more money as barbers, but they might be, you know, more fulfilled.

You don’t have to choose College or Not in high school No matter what’s next, success in high school lies in doing three things:

Take the most challenging and interesting classes you can, and be a good student So do the homework, take notes, review your homework and your notes, and at the end of each study session, ask yourself, how does this relate to what I learned yesterday?

Challenge yourself with learning activities outside the classroom A job, clubs, the youth group at your place of worship, sports teams—there are lots of ways to be an active participant and student of life. Find the stuff you love, and don’t be afraid to try new things. You were a really bad walker when you started. You got better.

Volunteer your time Everyone can do something to make the world a better place, including you. Share your time, share your talents, be a listening ear, coach a fourth-grade basketball team. You are needed.

Explore colleges Not every college requires four years of living in a dorm, and things like size, location, who else goes there, and the classes they offer make colleges very different from one another. Investigation is part of all growth, including the times when you conclude “Thanks, but I’ll pass”. But investigation comes before conclusion.

Applying to college is generally not rocket science The average student who goes to college applies to 5, all within 150 miles from home. The application for each of these colleges usually takes about 20 minutes to complete, without help from anyone. If the application is more complex, free online resources can help you put the pieces together, and most schools have counselors that will do the same thing.

College costs money In the 1950s, average college tuition cost as much as a new Chevrolet. Today, average college tuition costs—as much as a new Chevrolet. Expensive colleges usually offer help with paying for those who need it. Make sure you apply to a couple of colleges you like that are affordable, and you’ll be fine. Going into debt to go to college is a choice, not a mandate. You can still get a degree, buy pizza once a week, and start your career debt free.

That’s why you’re doing what you’re doing.

Welcome back.