Giving A Gift For School Counseling Week

by Patrick O'Connor, Ph.D.

Hamtramck is a Detroit enclave with Polish roots, a part of town where, in the day, neighbors would scrub their sidewalks together until you could eat off them. It’s a wonderfully diverse neighborhood now, still hosting a Paczki run each Lenten season, named after the Polish donut with a zillion calories you eat on Fat Tuesday. The route runs through neighborhoods, and your 5K effort is rewarded at the end with a table of Paczki.

As I ran past these very-close-together houses with kids in their pajamas sitting on the stoops, cheering for the runners (remember, this is February), I wished there was something I could do for this old-school, blue collar community. I was born in a neighborhood in northwest Detroit that wasn’t too different from this one, with homeowners who had been raised in the Depression, most of them having served in World War II, Korea, or both. Once they came home, there were only three things they wanted in life: a house with indoor plumbing (no, I am not kidding), a small yard to cut on sunny Saturday mornings and sit in on sunny Saturday afternoons in a folding chair, and the chance for their kids to go to college. Hamtramck was screaming the same vibe. If only I could figure out how to help. 

It turns out I didn’t have to do much but wish to make it so. About a week later, and completely out of the blue, the Hamtramck PTA president somehow tracked me down, and asked if I’d give a college access talk at their high school. We talked to set things up, and it was clear she was a go-getter, on of those moms who talked on the phone to set up dentist appointments with a baby on her hip, while gesticulating to her other children to get ready for school. It turned out Donna Reed wasn’t dead. She was now Greek, and living in Hamtramck.

I was ushered into a barren auditorium that was rich with the memory of ten thousand assemblies that all started with the Pledge of Allegiance. The walls were undecorated, likely holding their color from the Eisenhower administration, and the kid from the AV club set up a microphone the Andrews Sisters could have used. Students filtered in, many of them girls with covered heads, accompanied by mothers with covered heads, and several younger siblings. I shifted my gaze back and forth, seeing the face of each parent in the face of each student, and caught my breath. I was witnessing an illustration of the dictionary definition of family.

My presentation was warmly received, but only a handful of audience members came up to ask questions. At first, I wondered if my talk had met the needs of those in attendance, since most of my other presentations were concluded by go-getter parents lurching to the front of the room to ask about Harvard or something like that. It then occurred to me: this neighborhood doesn’t work that way. You make the most out of what’s given you, and express gratitude for the chance to do just that.

The PTA president was the last to talk to me, energized by the presentation, overflowing with kindness and gratitude. My payment was a handwritten thank you note and the best homemade Greek pastries I’ve ever had…

…and a reminder how lucky I am to be in a profession where I can make a difference, if only I put myself out there a little.

I know you’re busy. I am too. But you’ve got a Hamtramck, too.

Think about it.

Your Wish List for National School Counseling Week

by Patrick O'Connor, Ph.D.

I’m always a little hesitant to visit counselor chat rooms and social media posts this time of year, since a too frequent post appears:

“How are you celebrating National School Counseling Week?”

At one level, I get it. Since it’s National School Counseling Week—with an ing—this is a great opportunity to promote all the services counselors offer, or can offer, and refresh your school community’s awareness that your program exists, and is there to help. 

At another level, I can’t help but feel like we’re throwing our own birthday party. No, it isn’t National School Counselor Week—with a lor—but there’s something about us hosting events to celebrate what we do that makes me wonder—why isn’t somebody else shouting out for all we do?

It then realized I was looking at this all wrong. When someone asks what I want for my birthday, I’m not shy. Same thing with Christmas—after the year I got four chess sets, I decided maybe I needed to regulate the good intentions of my gift givers, all in everyone’s best interests.

That leads to this conclusion. Write a memo to your principal, reminding (informing?) them your profession’s big week is coming up, and ask if they would celebrate by giving you an hour of their time.

Yup. You need to party by taking a meeting.

You do this for three reasons. First, it’s the best way to make sure NSCW is on your administrator’s radar screen, increasing the chances they will arrange some schoolwide recognition. Second, if that doesn’t happen, it’s more likely they’ll at least bring coffee cake to the meeting.

Third, it provides an important opportunity to look at the big picture of your school counseling program, and ask for the help and support you need to help and support your students. There are way too many times during the school year when counselors think, hey, we really need to start doing this, or stop doing that, or change the way we do this. Why not use NSCW as an opportunity to put all those ideas together, and put them on the table?

It’s likely you already know what to talk about, but if you need a jumping off point, try these:

Job awareness This is a great time to tell your new administrator exactly what it is counselors do (don’t assume they know) or to update veteran administrators on how the job is going this year—are there more absence issues, social-emotional cases, etc? If you don’t typically get their ear, now is the time to basically make them listen, and that’s OK.

Annual review If it’s not already in place, this is the perfect time for you to request two meetings- one at the start of the year, and one at the end—to discuss the goals and progress of the school counseling curriculum. The fall meeting clarifies what you will and won’t be doing for the year, including those famous “other duties as assigned”. The spring meeting is a springboard for modifications you can work on over the summer.

Speaking of other duties You can’t hope to do more than classroom faculty, but you shouldn’t have to do more. This is the perfect time to discuss that.

Blue sky time It’s good to finish this meeting by going around the room and asking “What’s one way you’d like counseling to change?” (make sure you answer the question as well.) These short answers can be very revealing, and give you things to consider in preparation for the spring annual review meeting they just agreed to.

Improving College Access? Stop Deferring the Investment

by Patrick O'Connor, Ph.D.

The first round of Early Action college decisions is nearing an end, and it’s clear something is going on with them that, once again, makes them different from last year. School counselors are tearing their hair out over the number of deferrals students are receiving, which will likely suggest we’ll be hearing about record application numbers later this spring. After all, if you get a maybe from your dream school, you have to cover your bet by applying elsewhere—and preferably, lots of elsewheres.

The amount of attention the Early programs get each year, while important, continues to stoke the flames of the argument that college is only for certain students. There’s a point where applying to college turns away from being about the students, and is more about the spectacle of The Glories Of College—and that’s too bad.

So here’s my hope for this year, and I really hope America will consider these ideas.

Stop talking about the New York Times colleges so much It’s bad enough the New York Times thinks there are only 35 colleges in the country. It now seems, once again, there’s some kind of race to become one of them, and a race for the media to try and outdo each other’s coverage of them. There are about 3000 colleges in the US, and most of the college-going occurs outside these schools. Cover the other ones more, so more students will see college isn’t just for 4.5 GPAs who started six corporations before they were 12.

Colleges need to talk college to middle school families This may seem contradictory—if America needs to chill about colleges, why start college discussions sooner? 

Data indicates early conversations are important to have to get low-income and first-generation students — those less inclined to think about college—to give college a second thought. That means there are bright kids who have no impression —or worse, the wrong impression— about what college can do for them. Presenting a generic College Information Night at a middle school can open some eyes that need to see the possible — and these programs need to focus on both students and parents, since parents need a better understanding of college (especially the idea it doesn’t have to cost $60,000 a year).

Reach out online to urban and rural high schools Colleges tend to visit high schools where they know students are interested, and high schools that are close to each other. That only feeds the vicious Colleges Are Elite Places for Elite People beast. Use Zoom to visit far away or hard-to-get-to schools. It’s not as good as in person, but at least students can get access to college they aren’t getting now.

Get states to increase funding for dual enrollment College is less of a mystery if students take college classes in high school—but right now, tuition for those classes tends to come out of high school budgets. States need to create separate pools of money for first gens to get a taste of college. Data shows dual enrollers are more likely to go to college, and to finish college.

Consider college advisers College advisers are recent college grads, and most are first gens, who help students like them get to college. They get great training in college advising, not to replace counselors, but to serve as role models, and help make college more of a possibility. This is also a funding issue for states to consider—the training model is already there—and these folks can make a huge difference.

If we’re serious about expanding college access, it’s time to stop deferring.

College Counseling Should Be Taught in Grad School

by Patrick O'Connor, Ph.D.

The chat room posting started off easily enough, in a way I’d seen a thousand times before. “I’m new to the profession, and interviewing this week. What questions should I expect?”

I provided what I have long believed to be a helpful answer. “They will want to know about your college and career counseling curriculum. If they don’t ask about it, that’s a question you should ask them.”

I moved on to other things, but saw the author had responded. “Thanks. And what college and career counseling curriculum would you suggest?”

And suddenly, 2026 was 1984 all over again.

That’s the year I earned my Master’s degree in Counseling, with absolutely no references—in coursework or practicum—to college counseling. The moment I was in the field, I knew this was a gaping error, so I put together a curriculum for a graduate course in college counseling. Convinced this was just an innocent oversight, I sent it to the department chair of my newly minted alma mater, and even followed up with a phone call when I didn’t hear back.

I don’t think he could have been more surly. “We don’t have room in the program for any new courses” he growled, with a brevity that suggested the entire conversation was over.

That has more or less been the story for the past 40 years—we don’t have room, it’s not real counseling, college isn’t for everyone. Even when CACREP moved up the number of required credit hours for certification, college counseling got short shrift.

So here we still are, lots of new counselors who come running out of their office doors after just 15 minutes on the job, wondering just how to do this college counseling thing.

OK. One more time then.

Yes, counseling has a curriculum A good deal of counseling work is crisis management, but counseling also has a skill set to teach all students—stress management, problem solving, self-esteem, academic success, and postsecondary planning.

College counseling is part of that curriculum Of the 500+ counselor training programs in the US, last count showed less than two dozen had a course in college counseling, and about half spent no more than 15 clock hours on the subject if it was mentioned at all.

Not everyone needs to go to college… but everyone deserves to explore what college is, and how it can advance their goals, needs, and interests. That’s the goal of the college counseling curriculum.

This can’t be effectively learned on the job Counselors don’t learn crisis management, conflict resolution, or anger management on the job. Why is college counseling different?

College counseling isn’t just for elite high schools I’ve worked at elite high schools, and while I helped those students, most of them would have found college without me (yes, I said it). If anything, college counseling is more needed in high schools that serve low-income and first-generation students, since their college knowledge curve is more steep.

There’s room in grad schools to teach this Most counseling programs have 7 or 8 courses in Psychology, ample room to reorganize that content and make room for a college counseling course.

A grad school curriculum exists Courses in college counseling exist, and have specific outcomes. Take a look at this one.

School counselors have many goals, including the desire to make the world a better place. Start the new year off on the right foot, call your grad school, and tell them to offer a required course in college counseling. Don’t make the next generation of counselors learn the hard way, if indeed they learn at all.