by Patrick O'Connor, Ph.D.
More than a few colleges have already sent their admissions decisions out, in a year that’s starting earlier than ever. Some feel this is a sign that the old NACAC dates—notify by April 1, decide by May 1—really are on their way out, but either way, the decisions are coming, and we need to be as ready for them as the students are.
With that in mind, I’d like to revisit three chestnuts we all seem to rely on—and sometimes, over-rely on—this time of year. These phrases are always delivered with the best of intentions, but without some critical caveats, they don’t always serve their intended purpose, which is support of the student. Ready to refresh?
“You’ll be happy wherever you go.” This oldie but goodie tries to ease the pain of a student who didn’t get into their first choice college, and was given a significant boost in the thought world of college admissions with the 2016 release of Where You Go is Not Who You’ll Be. The idea here is simple; there’s more than one school where you will be able to tear up the curriculum and make the most of everything the college has to offer, as long as you are willing to work hard, take charge of your own future, and not wait for an invitation to participate.
I completely agree with this sentiment, and just wrote about a student who was in this exact position. I also know of several students where the opposite happened—they were indeed admitted to their first choice college, and chose to spend their four years either at tailgates or in their dorm rooms, deciding that a diploma with the name of a prestigious school was all they wanted out of the experience.
But these cases are something very different from picking a college at random and telling the student they’ll be happy there. Second- and third- choices—and I still believe it’s OK to call them that—are still choices that were made as a result of research and reflection. There are reasons why they ended up on the “Yes” list, even if they didn’t end up on the “YES!!!” list. Saying the student’s choice doesn’t really matter shows a lack of respect for the student, and for the effort they’ve put in to building their future. “You’ve worked hard to create great options for yourself” conveys a sentiment that the student has, and is still, driving the college bus, and it’s going to take them places, without patronizing them. Give that a try.
“We’ll see what the waitlist brings.” With rare exception, waitlists no longer serve the lone purpose of saying to a student “We’ll love to have you once we have room”. They now serve every purpose from a consolation prize (“Hey, you made the waitlist”) to one more piece of data that, in the eyes of some, increases the college’s prestige. Sure, colleges take students from waitlists, and the number varies greatly from year to year, but do your homework before you get a student’s hopes up. A waitlist of 2,000 is more likely a lottery than an opportunity. Be sure to frame the context.
“There’s always transfer.” Actually, no, there isn’t. As a rule, the lower the admit rate, the more likely it’s harder to get in as a transfer student—if they take transfers at all. Be sure to do your homework before throwing this option out there. Going as a guest student may be an option, but transfer isn’t always the gimme you think it is.
With that in mind, I’d like to revisit three chestnuts we all seem to rely on—and sometimes, over-rely on—this time of year. These phrases are always delivered with the best of intentions, but without some critical caveats, they don’t always serve their intended purpose, which is support of the student. Ready to refresh?
“You’ll be happy wherever you go.” This oldie but goodie tries to ease the pain of a student who didn’t get into their first choice college, and was given a significant boost in the thought world of college admissions with the 2016 release of Where You Go is Not Who You’ll Be. The idea here is simple; there’s more than one school where you will be able to tear up the curriculum and make the most of everything the college has to offer, as long as you are willing to work hard, take charge of your own future, and not wait for an invitation to participate.
I completely agree with this sentiment, and just wrote about a student who was in this exact position. I also know of several students where the opposite happened—they were indeed admitted to their first choice college, and chose to spend their four years either at tailgates or in their dorm rooms, deciding that a diploma with the name of a prestigious school was all they wanted out of the experience.
But these cases are something very different from picking a college at random and telling the student they’ll be happy there. Second- and third- choices—and I still believe it’s OK to call them that—are still choices that were made as a result of research and reflection. There are reasons why they ended up on the “Yes” list, even if they didn’t end up on the “YES!!!” list. Saying the student’s choice doesn’t really matter shows a lack of respect for the student, and for the effort they’ve put in to building their future. “You’ve worked hard to create great options for yourself” conveys a sentiment that the student has, and is still, driving the college bus, and it’s going to take them places, without patronizing them. Give that a try.
“We’ll see what the waitlist brings.” With rare exception, waitlists no longer serve the lone purpose of saying to a student “We’ll love to have you once we have room”. They now serve every purpose from a consolation prize (“Hey, you made the waitlist”) to one more piece of data that, in the eyes of some, increases the college’s prestige. Sure, colleges take students from waitlists, and the number varies greatly from year to year, but do your homework before you get a student’s hopes up. A waitlist of 2,000 is more likely a lottery than an opportunity. Be sure to frame the context.
“There’s always transfer.” Actually, no, there isn’t. As a rule, the lower the admit rate, the more likely it’s harder to get in as a transfer student—if they take transfers at all. Be sure to do your homework before throwing this option out there. Going as a guest student may be an option, but transfer isn’t always the gimme you think it is.
When "dream school" doesn't pan out and the disappointment is palpable, I find myself almost immediately announcing in lilting, Disney-esque tones, "Choices, choices, choices!" Indeed this small turn of the screw goes a long way to restoring the empowerment of the student by placing them back in the driver's seat.
ReplyDeleteI loathe nothing more than the Wait List. I pull no punches in piercing any thin veil of hope that this admissisons-yield-centric institutional vehicle serves. Post May 1st, students should only be free to embark on fostering the pride and emotional attachment to the school of their choice. The Wait List only mires this vision.
Buckling up for the next few weeks!